Lifestyle / Motivation

Unmask the Filters: How to Live a More Balanced Life By Embracing the Sad Moments

This article encourages us all to embrace the sad, unpleasant, unsettling and down moments in our lives and to take them head on, deal with them so we can quicker process them, gain whatever lesson, knowledge, awareness or emotion we have to acquire from them and then let them pass as part of living an authentic balanced life instead of ignoring them, and masking them with filters and shields of faux happiness.

May 17, 2021

Written by Nicole Commissiong

photo of rocks piled up on a ledge overlooking the shoreline during dawn or dusk

When you see the concept of a balanced life circulating in media, we mistakenly think balance means positivty and perfection.

However, people who see the glass half full have crappy days too. They know that living a life in balance means that you have permission to have bad days.

Balance requires one to sit in all the feelings and own them. Ignoring disturbing, unsettling, or conflicting unpleasant emotions can be damacing in the long run.

Instead, honor those emotions. Do not ignore them. They too are part of life and life is about energy in all its forms: positive and negative.

man with a brown leather briefcase under his arm and a coffee cup in another standing against wall with sunlight from blinds reflecting on his face and body.

Once we are conscious that it is absolutely necessary to honor all the sentiments and feelings, we can use tools to help us navigate through them, whether that be prayer, meditation, journaling or mind-body exercise like yoga.

A lot of people find it unsettling to acknowledge negative emotions and therefore, attempt to mask it to appear happy.

Don’t do it. It is very necessary to allow ourselves to feel it all. Experiencing it is actually freeing and empowering.

By delaying or not dealing with anxiousness or unease, we make it worse. Taking it head on, as soon as we recognize it will help us quicker surmount it.

We must be present and honor our feelings and honestly, should be more gentle with ourselves until the unsettling feelings and emotion subside and we return to our normal selves.

I am not immune to those down moments.

I recall times that I looked at my body and didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. I engaged in a bit of self loathing.

photo of a woman in a studio with recessed brick walls on a blue yoga mat doing a yoga pose. She has short cropped hair and is African American

I silently yearned for the size I was in my youth and wished I could turn back the clock and ten pounds with it. However, I know that my health is in the balance currently and that I am a work in progress. Yet, I allowed myself to have a sulking moment and when it passed, I remembered to to actually thank the body I have for the hard work it does on a daily basis given certain health circumstances.

It was moments like those that I realized how hard my body is working for me and to be patient with myself.

Again, whether it is anger, sadness, hurt, anxiety, frustration or any other seemingly negative emotion, honor it. Feel it.

That’s balance!

Recognize each emotion and allow yourself to feel each one.

Once I respect my feeling and sit with it, I reduce its power over me.

It dissipates and positive energy returns.

Life in balance is by no means a perfect life.

Give yourself permission to have crappy days. Don’t ignore your feelings, honor and respect them. Know your triggers. Be gentle with yourself and slowly your positive energy will resume. Be patient, be loving, be in balance and embrace your journey.